Dialogue

Mom: Deboo, how did you get here from your planet?

Deboo: I'm not here yet.
...
Poo: But he didn't come from another planet, he came from your belly! How did he get in your belly?

Moe: When two people love each other very much they get together and buy a baby on the Internet.

Lisa's 2007 Resolutions

I haven't made any new years resolutions for... oh, twenty years or so. Not that I don't really think self-improvement is a good idea, its just that when I want to make a change I never see the point in waiting until the new year; I usually just start right away.

However, in the spirit of the season I've decided to put together a few things.
So for 2007, I resolve to:

1. Spend more time with my dog. He's the only one that consistently eats my cooking, comes when called, leaves when asked, and thinks I'm wonderful even without makeup. You can't buy love like that.
   
   
2. Cook more. Now, #1 might lead you to believe that I'm not that great of a cook, and you'd be right! But eating out is expensive, and you never really know what kind of add-ins they put in your food. This leads me into the next one...
   
   
3. Be well. I've lost twelve pounds in the last three months, and it would be easy to say that one of my resolutions would be to lose ten more pounds. But as a former athlete, I know that it is inches and body mass index that matter, not poundage. Especially since muscle weighs more than fat, pound for pound. So my resolution is to 1) keep up the rather stringent exercise program I've already implemented; 2) exercise portion control; and 3) get myself back to "hot babe-ness". I've also switched to hard liquor and laid off the beer... you know, in the interest of calorie control.
   
   
4. Spend more time with my dog. He's good for my ego.
   
   
5. Think up something for 2008. Since I will be officially perfect after the success of the above four resolutions, I will have to put some serious work into coming up with something for next year. ;)